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03/10/2004
To the Virgins, to Make Much of...well, something
Hard on the heels of Monday's orgy of confession comes this timely little news item:
A researcher says 'Just say no' doesn't work in the long term, after finding that the rates of sex diseases for teens who pledge virginity until marriage and for those who don't are similar.
PHILADELPHIA - Teenagers who make a one-time pledge to remain virgins until marriage catch sexually transmitted diseases about as often as those who don't pledge abstinence, according to a study of the sex lives of 12,000 adolescents.
Those who make a public pledge to delay also wind up having fewer sex partners and get married earlier, the research shows. But the two groups' STD rates were statistically similar.
Item 1: Asking a teenager to be sexually abstinent is an awfully tall order. Asking a teenager to sign a public virginity pledge borders on insanity. When I was fifteen, I didn't even want to tell my parents what I did in school that day, much less announcing to the world my plans for sexual congress.
Item 2: The study found that teens who took a virginity pledge were less likely to use condoms than teens who planned to have sex, and suggested that would-be virgins paid less attention in sex education classes because they didn't expect to need information about safe sex and STDs.
Item 3: The study also found that would-be virgins married earlier than their peers who were under no such delusions. Just what America needs: a lot of torqued-up adolescents marrying young without first being sure they're compatible with their mate.
Item 4: The headlines that ran with this story in various outlets made my day: Virgin teens 'have same STD rate'. Study: 'Virgin' teens get STDs. Study examines STD rates of teen virgins. Like a virgin, but still with STD. I think "virgin" in quotes is a particularly nice touch. Do you think the copy chief at the Associated Press has a sense of humor?
Posted by Julie at 10:42 AM in I've learned a lot...but I'm not sure it's worth it. | Permalink
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It's BIF time again! We're going with genres here today. Julie at A Little Pregnant and getupgrrl at Chez Miscarriage are.. how can I say this? They are outrageous and poignant and irreverent and scary-intelligent and well-informed and two of... [Read More]
Tracked on Mar 10, 2004 12:09:07 PM
Comments (15)
When I was 13-14 my boyfriend and I would go to church, vow not to have sex and then go to his house and do it anyways.
Posted by: cheryl b. at Mar 10, 2004 11:48:37 AM
Cheryl, I can maybe beat you:
I lost my virginity to my pastor's son at the youth director's house (he was housesitting). Nice.
I'm glad to know my STD rate didn't vary much from my virgin-till-marriage cousins'.
Posted by: Julia at Mar 10, 2004 11:57:02 AM
I have a 15 year old nephew who is the direct result of the the "I don't need birth control because I'm not going to DO it" train of thought.
Posted by: Kristine at Mar 10, 2004 12:00:38 PM
Julia that's so badass. Hey if you're going to sin do it right;)
Luckily for me I soon decided that all religians were a crock of shit and so I didn't feel guilty anymore.
The fact that I have never had an STD is a source of constant amazement.
Posted by: cheryl b. at Mar 10, 2004 12:04:09 PM
When I was trying to talk to my 16 year old sister about safe sex she told me that she wasn't going to get pregnant because she "said so". She is now 7 months along and doesn't know who the father is!
Posted by: cheryl b. at Mar 10, 2004 12:10:21 PM
Julia rocks the house. The house of the Lord. Hosanna, baby.
Cheryl, I suppose dancing around your sister and telling her "I told you so" in a singsong voice would be, ah, cruel. I hope she's managing.
Posted by: Julie at Mar 10, 2004 12:52:33 PM
After she told me she was pregnant she said in a cheerful voice "but thats o.k., 'cause I'm gonna get an abortion." I think we should poke her with sticks.
Posted by: cheryl b. at Mar 10, 2004 1:00:23 PM
Somewhere right now there is a "virgin" waving those headlines around saying "But Mom, it says right here even virgins get STD's, so that means you can get them without doin' it. Me'n him never did nothing, honest. oh, i forgot to take my penicillin again. Grounded, but why? You're so mean!!
Posted by: jc at Mar 10, 2004 2:25:17 PM
plz send me suggession about getting pregnant
Posted by: roshanee at Apr 8, 2004 7:05:35 AM
wow, you are rediculus. i dont even have time to waste explaining how absurd it is to say that (essentially) abstinance is useless. you are retarted, but i pray for you...
Posted by: wow at May 26, 2005 1:13:50 AM
Ok, so I'm responding to a really old post, but you linked it, so it's not my fault.
My teenage sister said to me (I swear to God, I am not making this up!) "I can't get pregnant, I'm only sleeping with one guy."
Posted by: Angie at May 27, 2005 10:07:19 PM
Oh, my. The best laid plans... It amazes me how clueless some people are about sex. Actually, it frightens me. Even if you don't PLAN on having sex til marriage, you still need to know what goes on. Thank goodness I had a nurse for a mom who could supplement my paltry Christian school sex ed.
Posted by: Heather at Jun 4, 2005 8:12:53 AM
My philosophy is at least this: If I am going to have the equipment on me at all times to get pregnant or STDs, then I will carry the equipment on me at all times to NOT get pregnant or STDs.
Posted by: Subversive Mother at Feb 16, 2006 8:56:31 PM
Waiting until you are married is not something to make fun of. If you stand by it and trust who you are and what you know about him and you're basic inter voice, it will be right. I was raped as a child and everyone kept telling me that sex was beautiful and special if done with the right person. I thought it was a lie, because my first time wasn't beautiful nor special. I thought I loved him and I married him, but it was wrong. My second was amazing and I understood about it being beauitful and special. Things happen though. Life happens.
Now years later...I am a single mother of three struggling to make it. Abortion isn't the only way because children can be a blessing if you wait. Get all of your partying and craziness out of the way, so you can be a better mother and it helps to have a father. Since my babies' dad left when I was three months pregnant with my third child I haven't had sex. There are more important things to worry about then if a guy likes me, if sex will change things (it does). I have decided to go to college and make my own path without a man. Two years, no sex. It isn't so bad. No one to answer to.
Posted by: Veronica at Aug 15, 2006 8:54:52 PM
I never sex tell now.but we have a social contract wich is called marriage there is no conceptof STDs here bcz every one is clear from sin.sin is the key of hell.
in a society when a nephew sex his aunt our other close realtion do it.They disobey the roles of god and they will pay for it.also in this world and in the day of judgment.
keep ur Reccord Clear.
here every girl is virgin and we have full rights having sex but after marriage.and remember we have only one wife for a life time.bcz of this the future of our chlidren remains bright and protected.
Try to become muslim u will realise that nature is calling u.
God bless u all.
Posted by: Qaisar at May 8, 2007 5:58:25 PM
